Before we get started, I want to add this disclaimer: I’m a huge advocate for therapy. I believe therapy has the power to heal, guide, and transform lives. In fact, I majored in psychology (many moons ago) with the intention of becoming a therapist, and as of late, I’ve been seriously considering going back to school to become a psychologist. Why? Because I’ve seen firsthand how therapy can help people. That said, I’ve also noticed a troubling trend: we tend to put therapists on a pedestal, treating their advice as gospel and many tend to look at a therapists’ words as law.
Now, this article isn’t about dismissing therapy or therapists, however, I do want to challenge the misconception that therapists are infallible while hopefully helping those of you reading this to shift the narrative toward a collaborative therapy process—one where the client is an active participant in their healing journey.
Therapists Are Human
One of the biggest therapy misconceptions is the belief that therapists are somehow immune to the flaws and failings of the rest of us. But the truth is, therapists are human. They make mistakes. They have blind spots. Many therapists even enter the field because of their own struggles or traumas, hoping to use what they’ve learned to help others. And while that can make them compassionate and empathetic, it also means they still have - and sometimes bring their own baggage to the table.
I’ve vetted and worked with my share of therapists over the years and I’ve seen some things that truly surprised me. I’ve watched an anger management therapist lose their temper and lash out, failing to use the very tools they were supposed to teach others. I’ve heard therapists give terrible advice that caused more harm than good. I’ve seen therapists who talk extensively about narcissism but exhibit narcissistic traits themselves.
I’ve been shocked to witness some therapists align with ideologies that seem to contradict their professional training. It’s disheartening to see certain therapists echoing shallow, often toxic ideas from social media—ideas that, frankly, have no place in a therapy room.
This isn’t to bash therapists or dismiss their expertise. It’s a reminder that therapists, like all humans, are fallible. And if we understand that, we can approach therapy in a healthier, more balanced way.
Therapy Is a Collaborative Process
The biggest issue with putting therapists on a pedestal is that it can make you passive in your own healing. Too often, people start therapy and surrender their autonomy, believing their therapist holds all the answers. But the reality is, no therapist can know every detail of your life. Your lived experience is nuanced, complex, and unique, and no one else can fully understand it the way you do.
That’s why I believe therapy works best as a collaborative process. A good therapist provides guidance, tools, and frameworks to help you navigate your challenges, but it’s up to you to decide what resonates and what doesn’t. You have to bring your own wisdom, intuition, and discernment to the table.
For example, if your therapist gives advice that doesn’t feel right, don’t be afraid to question it. Ask yourself: does this align with my values and experiences? Does it help me move forward and reach my therapeutic goals?Am I honoring myself and trusting in my own guidance system ABOVE my therapists advice? If the answer is no, it doesn’t mean therapy isn’t working, it just means you’re playing an active role in your own healing.
Why This Conversation Is So Important
As someone who’s seriously considering re-entering the therapeutic field, I don’t take this conversation lightly. I want to bring integrity, compassion, and accountability to the work I do. But more importantly, I want to encourage others to approach therapy with a healthy balance of trust and critical thinking.
Therapists are there to guide, not to save. They’re there to help you uncover your own truths, not to dictate them. When we stop idolizing therapists and instead see them as partners in our healing journey, we create space for a more empowering relationship.
At the end of the day, therapy is a powerful tool, but it’s not about perfection; neither yours nor your therapist’s. Healing is about progress, about learning to trust yourself, and about taking ownership of your journey.
So yes, seek therapy. Be open to your therapist’s guidance. But don’t be afraid to question, to filter, and to honor your own intuition. When you do, you’ll not only get more out of the process, but you’ll also reclaim your role as the expert on your own life. And that, more than anything, is the foundation for true healing, growth and lasting transformation.
Looking to start your therapy journey? Check out this article: Start Your Therapy Journey With This List https://www.thehealspace.co/post/therapy-resources-and-directory-for-people-of-color
Reading and Resources
• Debunking Therapy Myths: An article from Psychology Today discussing common therapy misconceptions.
• What Is Collaborative Therapy?: A resource from Verywell Mind on how collaborative therapy works.
• Get the Facts About Psychotherapy: An APA article dispelling myths and highlighting the collaborative nature of therapy.
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